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My close friend after finding out that velvet, especially the fake kind, gives me goosebumps and a very brief lisp, called me, out of love mind you, the oddest person he knows. I am not sure all the time that is a good thing but I have to admit, I have tendencies that most do not. Call it OCD, ADHD, craziness, peculiarities, or what have you but nevertheless they are me. So I am going to start listing my odd thoughts, my adventures that I do, my peculiar way of doing things. And perhaps you have done similar things or now you can try or be them as well! Do not think I am truly crazy, I am just unique. And this is not about “LOOK AT ME!” but about fun ideas, quirky things and even hearing if you relate to any. Please comment! Hope you enjoy.

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-TIME TRAVEL-I know how to time travel. Seriously. Everyone tells me that this is a farce but I do. In fifth grade I realized it when sitting through a horrendous lecture from a teacher. I realized that it I focused real hard and made a mental note in the back of my mind, an alarm clock if you will, that when I graduated high school I would remember this exact day, the feel, the look of the room, ect. Then I will have time traveled. I would have looked back and realized I have surpassed those agonizing years of high school. The greatest part, I still do this when I have a boring or bad day at work or I need bad day in general. Try it, it is quite refreshing when you realize you are over the hard times.

-I organize my fruit snacks by color, then eat the biggest pile first then follow suit to the smallest

-I HATE velvet, like how some hate fingernails on a chalkboard. I get goosebumps and a lispe

-I am constantly watching others and when I see a habit, a way they say something, ect I like to take it on myself. In high school I thought I was a chameleon. Sure, I have my unique things but some things are just so interesting and cool

-I like to lock the passenger door of the car I am riding in and then see if it opens while someone is driving. It drives one of my friends CRAZY when I do it because his car door does open, I find it very funny and I am very curious. Almost did it to my GF’s parents car while they were driving but held back.

-I wonder if chairs get lonely when they are moved away from a table of other chairs to a bar alone?

-I have a great fear of the wide open ocean with large whales around. Perhaps I feel I will be squished or lost in the great expanse of it all.

-I loved Independence Day (when it came out) so much that I collected every toy that came out and actually made a scrapbook of every magazine, newspaper, and online article along with pictures I could find.

-I love to dance and watched endless amounts of Michael Jackson videos to learn his moves when I was in middle school. I still do it. Dancing is actually the only thing I completely lose myself in. However, I am terrible at dancing with a partner or not free-styling.

-I am constantly asking God why we do not fly and how can our imaginations think up things that do not necessarily exist. However, we can never think up anything completely new.

-There is nothing like a slurpee or slushie in the shower or hot tub, seriously try it, the cool and the hot is an incredible experience.

-I always wanted to know how Clint Eastwood could smoke this cigars so close to his mouth. I figured it out and now I can smoke a cigar down to its nub right near burning the lips but not. Now I can’t smoke a cigar unless I smoke it all, it seems a waste to not. I do not smoke often but something about it just makes you feel like a man.

-If I had it my way I would just wear jeans, tennis shoes and no shirt. Or on an island in board shorts no shirt, no shoes. I tried to walk around once with no shoes to get my soles tough enough so I could walk around without shoes but it didn’t last long. I worried about walking on glass by accident.

-I wore goggles (not ski ones but the kind of ones that are colorful and round) on my forehead in high school cause I thought and YES still do think it looks awesome. I saw Powerman 5000 do it. I don’t care, I still think it is cool.

-I have had ankle bracelets on my ankles for 12 years now. The first ever one I got is from Hawaii and I still have it to this day. I have to remake them when they get worn. Now it is symbolic of my travels. I have three ones on my left and two on my right. One for a mission trip to Jamaica, mission trip to Thailand, mission trip to Guatemala, a trip to Turkey, Greece and Israel and then Hawaii of course. As of now my ankles have always had one on even while I am repairing others. I have never been without.

-I have had a soul patch since I could grow one. I have shaved it once I believe. The whole reason is because Jason Presely had one in Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie and I thought it was so cool I wanted one. I still think it is awesome and not sure if I will ever shave it off.

-I am not too fond of this memory as many people made fun of me. My brother said I should start a fad in middle school so I wore two different shoes, completely different. Different style, color, logo, hightop, lowtop, ect. Even a teacher made fun of me because of it. It sucked but I am glad I tried. And no, it never caught on.

-I exercised my eyebrow to do Michael Keaton’s eyebrow raise from the movie Batman. I have done it so long now that it is actually a part of my natural facial expressions.

-I taught my facial muscles to do a grinch impression. It is not half bad.

-I spray painted my truck with stencils. I love my truck. It is an awesome beater. I will post pictures of it sometime. It cost me $1. A blessing of a gift from a friend when I couldn’t afford a car; still can’t. I also painted my motorcycle, also a gift from a friend for very cheap, with COUGAR written on the side.

-My older brother taught me how to make my calf muscles dance without moving my foot. I was like seven. I still can do it. I think I do these odd muscle things because it is so hard to focus and get them to move on command.

-I get my best ideas (stories and movies) on the toilet. Maybe that was too much information.

-I relate to movies probably more than people’s stories. Not that I do not respect or still glean from others stories just something in movies. My best friend N.L. and I love horror movies in fact we break it down afterward and find a lot of themes in it and find redeeming value.

-I had a younger brother die when I was seven I think. He had a complicated heart murmur but it was mostly malpractice. He was born in July and lived till November. My parents obviously didn’t know he would pass away. My mom always loved the name Jason so she named him Jason. If you take the first letter of every month he lived it spells his name. July, August, September, October, November. Sometimes we think he died so my parents could start Compassionate Friends which helps grieving parents. My uncle said one time out of the blue Jason had died for me. We were all struck dumbfounded not sure what to say, not cause we thought it was rude, but rather something holy. So we left it at that.

-I always wanted to live in the shower. I heard they did this on Seinfeld once but I have been wanting to do it since 1991 way before Seinfeld. I always dreamed of making rooms and hallways where there were always shower heads going. Of course you wear a bathing suit when friends are around. But now I think it would be cool just to have it all around and be naked.

-The shower thing led to a bet in college, I was too poor one week to go to the movies so my friends (really just wanting to go to the movies) bet me I couldn’t take a shower for 3 hours. I took the bet, put on a swimming suit and took a shower for three hours. Friends came to visit me and brought chairs to talk, one brought me reading material in a zip lock bag, another brought me a tootsie roll pop where I decided to figure out how many licks it took to get to the center, but sadly I forgot it was just to the center so I counted all the way until it was gone. Sadly I lost the number, I wrote it down, it had a margin of error because of the steam from the shower. My roommates also at one point dumped snow on me and threw snow balls at me, it was pretty funny though

-I put a blonde strip in my hair in college. It wasn’t big but I loved it. I still think it is awesome and still want to do it again someday when I have enough money to do it. Some of my friends called it my lucky stripe at CU football games and would rub it for luck.

-I once gave a braveheart speech wearing a buffalo hat (like the Grand Puba in Flintstones) at my last CU football game as a student. I stood up at halftime when everyone was sitting down and screamed it. I was all painted up. For two years I painted up (full black paint on my chest and face) along with friends at the football game it was awesome. Everyone cheered but I was majorly embarrassed afterward.

-On opening night of The Ring my friends went to see it in a packed theater. I just wasn’t in the mood and neither was my good friend C.L. we were joking throughout it and I told him at the end I know there will be a quick something before the credits to make everyone jump and scream. I told him everyone would scream so I am going to scream as loud as I can. Sure enough, they flashed the monster and I screamed at the top of my lungs. But everyone was silent. I was the only one that screamed. The theater errupted in laughter. As I excited the theater my friends were making fun of me and random strangers were saying, hey you were the guy that screamed!

-I have always wanted to punch a pigeon in the head. Not to be malicious, I just think it would be hilarious because they look like they are just so dumb going around thinking, “duh…duh…duh.” And you know if you punched it in the head it would just fall over, get back up and go about it’s routine as if nothing happened!